Last week saw the announcement of the Oakley Meta Vanguard.

Oakley Meta Vanguards are a new range of sunglasses from Oakley – the sister company of Ray-Ban – that comes with a built in camera (Ray-Ban Wayfarers have also recently been introduced with a camera).

The specification includes integration with Strava and Garmin to feedback performance metrics via a Meta AI app.

Yes. THAT Meta.

I mean, what kind of idiot wants to ask Meta of all things how they’re doing while on a bike ride?

With the advent of smart glasses 2.0 we now have:

• Video capture of everyone and everything the wearer interacts with – whether you like it or not.
• An app that continuously monitors where you are and what you are doing with even more contextual information (i.e. data-mining).
• Idiots on public roads and trails trying even harder to score personal best times with immediate feedback – presumably paying commensurately less attention to their surroundings and the general public while doing so.

I can’t tell you how much I hate this.

My main gripe is the camera and video capture. I have no wish to be filmed without my consent just going about my business. Still less do I want to be recorded while enjoying my precious recreation time.

I have no wish to ‘go viral’ or to be an internet meme, monitoring my interactions not just within my own peer group but in casual and fleeting interactions with other road and trail users for slights, offences, shade and ellisions that the internet deems ‘bad’ that day.

Back when Google first brought out Google Glass I heard a podcast with a well-known Silicon Valley exec (well-known at least by Silicon Valley standards) raving about being able to use the internet in the shower and being able to film every person he met.

Who the hell would want to do that??

The term Glasshole was soon coined and it tanked the product overnight.

I can’t think of a better fate for these Oakley and Ray-Ban glasses to be honest.

Once a Glasshole, always a Glasshole…

About the author

Matt is one of the founding Molefathers of the Muddymoles, and is the designer and main administrator of the website.

Having ridden a 2007 Orange Five for many years then a 2016 YT Industries Jeffsy 29er, he now rocks a Bird Aether 9 and a Pace RC-627.

An early On-One Inbred still lurks in the back of the stable as a reminder of how things have moved on. You can even find him on road bikes - currently a 2019 Cannondale Topstone 105 SE, a much-used 2011 Specialized Secteur and very niche belt drive Trek District 1.

If you've ever wondered how we got into mountain biking and how the MuddyMoles started, well wonder no more.