In a word. No. This bizarre cross between a back pack and a kite sail is brought to you by the mind of a professional paraglider.

I’m mean, maybe he ride bikes too?

But in a world where the UCI regulates the height of your socks its hard to see the peloton (and by extension, image conscious cycling enthusiasts) adopting this kind of gimmick any time soon. I feel the creator of this particular Frankstein – the RAF1 Pioneering Bike Backpack – hasn’t really considered the core market he’s aiming for.

Look at the video on the Ram Air Fairing (RAF) Pioneering site for a start.

The enlightened roadie positively shreds past a visibly labouring gravel rider on a pristine Alpine road, tapping out 120rpm on 25mm tyres while the poor sap on his 45c G-Ones can barely climb the hill. Uphill, downhill, in ya face suckers! That’s reduced air drag for you.

After selling the benefits (not the features) to his gravel pal they are soon sharing tarmac and good times together. So the RAF backpack is clearly pitched at the kind of sport and enthusiast cyclists I mention above rather than give a helping hand to utility cyclists.

But…

Why do ideas like this even have to be spoken aloud? Why not just keep some thoughts to yourself? That would have kept this particular Kickstarter off our screens and saved the team that created it at least two years of their life.

By my estimation they’ve still got the denial, anger, rationalisation, depression and acceptance stages to get through, which could easily cost them two more years on top of their efforts so far.

In a world where road and gravel e-bike manufacturers go to considerable lengths to make their bikes look normal and not in any way like the rider has bought themself an extra 350w of assistance, why would anyone rock up to a group ride with a giant sail on their back to advertise dignity comes a poor second to speed?

This product is said to be the result of ‘rigorous experimentation’ which is a synonym for massive levels of guesswork. In fact, there are no measurable benefits I can see. Claims include ‘slash[ed] drag’, ‘boost[ed] speed’ and a ‘noticeable difference’; but no hard numbers.

Nor is it easy to accept that this airfoil backpack is in any way stylish – you’d look like the most disappointing Uber delivery rider ever, turning up – potentially sooner than expected – with no food at all, just thin air.

Lastly, it apparently has a built in airbag. I admit this leaves me nonplussed, a disconcerting state of being in a world that strives for plussedness.

We’ve all seen those videos of hair-trigger Hovding airbag helmets leading me to speculate on the consequences of a sudden deployment with the airfoil. Hero to zero in the blink of an eye. Is the airbag supposed to protect in the event of OTB (Over the Bars) accidents or from being rear ended? What? When? How?

This is a nonsense idea. It literally makes no sense. A moment’s critical thought raises so many further questions. What happens in crosswinds? Who is actually going to buy it? Who has a social network that can survive that level of mickey taking?

I’m starting to wonder if this is actually intended to make cyclists look even more stupid than normal in order to deter potential cyclists altogether; a sort of Koch brothers funded anti-bike initiative.

Cyclists – wise up! Don’t do this to ourselves!!

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About the author

Matt is one of the founding Molefathers of the Muddymoles, and is the designer and main administrator of the website.

Having ridden a 2007 Orange Five for many years then a 2016 YT Industries Jeffsy 29er, he now rocks a Bird Aether 9 and a Pace RC-627.

An early On-One Inbred still lurks in the back of the stable as a reminder of how things have moved on. You can even find him on road bikes - currently a 2019 Cannondale Topstone 105 SE, a much-used 2011 Specialized Secteur and very niche belt drive Trek District 1.

If you've ever wondered how we got into mountain biking and how the MuddyMoles started, well wonder no more.